Kudos to Amber for coming up with the perfect idea for a bachelor party that did not actually involve boobies

It's a gun...

No! No! It's a...

Flame thrower!

Special thanks to Joshua at Bluelens for bringing his camera along, and for finding the best quote imaginable for these pictures (sadly, we cannot replicate the thick West-End accent this dialog was spoken in. You'll have to imagine them said as if Eliza Doolittle's three-times-great grandson never got out and instead went very, very bad):

Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action.

And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two small mincey faggot balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties mangled up. There's no pussy here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman.

Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with ya. The fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your gun. (withdraws his gun) And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O" written on the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence.

Now... Fuck off.