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Disco Goldfish
There's always this point in a hobby, a sort of "widget too far." Something so out there, so unnecessary, it just screams "I officially have no life." With some folks, it's an actual mascot costume from their favorite team, mounted in the den. With others, it's the entire series run of Wonder Woman, complete with extra commentary and Genuine Rope of Truth, presented proudly at the boss's dinner party. A still different set of people, well they tend to giggle in a dark room, alone with a lamp and bit of cardboard or paper in a plastic cover.
But I'm not any of those people. You see, I have fish. When someone obsesses about their fish, they don't have to spend a lot of money or do a lot of searching or display anything particularly rare. They just have to set up a disco in their fish tank.
Yeah, you heard me. A disco. In the tank. I did too. I did too!
My regular weekend outing to the pet store with Olivia was a good one to say the least. We'd picked out a new goldfish to add to the 50 gallon tank (yes, I have goldfish in the old oscar tank), and were heading for the cashier when we crossed the laser system. It was another one of those, well, Holy shopping events. There's a moment sometimes, when you come around a corner of an isle. Suddenly, the clouds part, sunbeams rake down like heavenly searchlights, tiny winged cherubs flutter down, and a chorus of hosannahs ring from on high, all highlighting That One Product.
Well, ok, maybe it was just a teenager screwing up the lights on a new catfood display and the Muzak suddenly switching to an old Avril Lavigne song. It was magic, ok? Well, Olivia thought it was magic. Of course, Olivia thinks milk leaking out of her sippy cup is magic, but trust me you take your "oh wow!!!"'s where you can get them.
So in went The MiracleBeamtm AQUARIUM LASER SYSTEM. According to the box, It's The Most Revolutionary Concept in Aquariums Today! Perfect for Fresh or Saltwater Fish! Creates an Aquarium Night Light of Unmatched Beauty! COMPLETELY SAFE FOR ALL FISH! It even came complete with a free treasure chest. A laser treasure chest! While Olivia pointed and yelled "Dog-EE! Dog-EE! Dog-EE!" at everything in the checkout line (in a pet store, this can take awhile), it became... mine.
Scott: "You bought a disco light system."
Me: "Yup!"
Scott: "For... your fish."
Me: "Yup! Ain't it great?"
Scott: "Whats next? A disco ball? How about some playing them some Donna Summer?"
Me: "OOoo...ya know if they made one of those... I think I rememb--"
Scott: "Oh Jesus! Never mind I mentioned that!"
Me: "Weee!!! I have to call Amber!"
*RiNg!!*
Amber: "You got a what? OMG!! [I swear, the only woman in the world that actually speaks in initials --Scott] I have to come see it this week! What? Hang on a sec...Ron wants one now."
So there went the conversation for 10 minutes or so, about how our fish could have play dates in the disco. Yes, we are really that messed up when it comes to our pets.
The new fish is acclimating fine. The disco looks great. If only they could wear tiny polyesther suits and platform shoes, and the black fish maybe an afro wig. No giant man-in-the-moon with a coke spoon though. Well, not right away anyway. Now if i could just find that disco ball...
I want to see pictures!!
Posted by: nina on January 16, 2005 05:56 PMCheck with a store that sells Mardi-Gras beads. I've seen a small disco ball on a strand of beads in several different places.
Posted by: Brass on January 16, 2005 06:34 PMOk Brass, that's what is known as "not helping"... mmkay? Bad enough she goes "bow chikka bow-bow" and dances in front of the tank every time she turns the lights on in it.
Lights on. In a tank. Laser lights.
*sigh*
Posted by: scott on January 16, 2005 06:35 PMWait a damn second here - Ron never said he wanted one of these. Ron only allowed the purchase of a 10 gallon tank because someone had tingly ovaries. Ron was then completely not consulted when we ended up with a 927 gallon tank with 4.2 million little horny mollies.
Here's how much I was consulted:
Amber - "Hey, come to the pet store. We can't get this in the Cruiser."
Ron - "Get what in the Cruiser?"
A - "Uhmmmmm. Well... You remember, uhmm, well..."
R - "Yes?"
A - "Well, uhmm, the new fish tank."
R - "We have a fish tank."
A - "Yes, but it's not big enough."
R - "You bought a tank that won't fit in a Plymouth PT Cruiser?!?"
and on it went...
What I'd get for the tank is a large predatory fish..
Posted by: ron on January 16, 2005 07:31 PMOK.... lets look at this again. We have a 40 gallon take and about 30 Mollies. Someone tonight has been drinking a little to much and doing nothing but watching football. So the previous posting by Ron was soberiety-impaired. AND..it wont be to long before we have our own laser light/laser treasure chest for the Mollies. Its that or a baby BUCKO!!!
Posted by: Amber on January 16, 2005 07:40 PMdamn - I wanted to at least make it to 40 prior to getting a vasectomy...
This is gonna change my plans for the week.
Posted by: Ron on January 16, 2005 07:41 PMI know we have horny Mollies honey, but I would hope that you would not lower yourself to f**kin' my fish. You wierd bastard!!!
IN CARRIES FAMOUS WORDS "USE A CONDOM" !!!!
I just like the Plymoth PT Cruiser remark.....
Posted by: Jeff on January 16, 2005 08:12 PMRON!!! its a Chrysler!!!! sheesh.. too much wine for you!
Posted by: ellen on January 16, 2005 08:31 PMPlay nice children. Ellen I am so sorry we didn't take a trip to the pet story. I would love to see Olivia dancing to the fish tank disco music. chicka a boom boom!
Posted by: Pat on January 17, 2005 02:37 AMPlymouth, Chrysler, whatever. Does it truly make a difference? At least I had the major manufacturer correct...
Posted by: Ron on January 17, 2005 07:49 AMand you know, I checked out their site - seems that there are also flashing LED lights that you could add to the background, or maybe with the aforementioned disco ball...
Posted by: Ron on January 17, 2005 08:38 AMnoway! they are making illuminated backrounds too!!! WEE!!
Posted by: ellen on January 17, 2005 09:33 AM*laughs* A LASER Light like as in to drive the Oscar crazy. OOOOO *Evil Grin* Musashi needs some really good excerise yeah that's the ticket.
Sounds Spledid, and I would love the disco ball too!
I'm a short italian chic that can't reach the buttom of the oscars tank, Hell that's what his pleco is for. Oscar is currently 5 to 6 inches in a 35 gallon tank. I have a 55 gallon tank to put him in, I need to cycle it either this month or the next. Mine is getting jumpy too! I love it. Of course he's not big enough to eat a finger yet. But he's getting ther Fast!
Casscia
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Dear Sirs,
Nice to contact you . At first let me give you a simple introduction about our company.Our company is a foreign trade enterprise that is engaged in the production of industrial green laser stage light, Red laser stage light, Red&Green mixed (just yellow)laser stage light , flash light ,green laser pointer and green laser module.We has established an excellent reputation worldwide for developing and manufacturing the electronic products . If you are interested in our company,and you think our products fit your market,pls feel free contact us ASAP. I will send you more detail information about our company and our products. At the same time , you can also go to our website to know our company .Pls see the following contact information.I 'm looking forward to your reply.Thanks!
Best Regards,
Grace for Mr Andy Lai
Our contact information:
Mr Andy Lai
Dongguan Bei-sheng Technology Co., Ltd
Add: No.3,QiaoFeng 1Road, Qiaofeng Industrial District, Xialang Town
Dongguan City,GuangDong, China
Tel: 86-769-6767667/ 6767669/ 6766935
Fax: 86-769-6767660
Http://www.dgbstech.com or www.bs-tec.com E-mail: dgbstech@vip.163.com
Dear Sirs,
Nice to contact you . At first let me give you a simple introduction about our company.Our company is a foreign trade enterprise that is engaged in the production of industrial green laser stage light, Red laser stage light, Red&Green mixed (just yellow)laser stage light , flash light ,green laser pointer and green laser module.We has established an excellent reputation worldwide for developing and manufacturing the electronic products . If you are interested in our company,and you think our products fit your market,pls feel free contact us ASAP. I will send you more detail information about our company and our products. At the same time , you can also go to our website to know our company .Pls see the following contact information.I 'm looking forward to your reply.Thanks!
Best Regards,
Grace for Mr Andy Lai
Our contact information:
Mr Andy Lai
Dongguan Bei-sheng Technology Co., Ltd
Add: No.3,QiaoFeng 1Road, Qiaofeng Industrial District, Xialang Town
Dongguan City,GuangDong, China
Tel: 86-769-6767667/ 6767669/ 6766935
Fax: 86-769-6767660
Http://www.dgbstech.com or www.bs-tec.com E-mail: dgbstech@vip.163.com