As a parent-to-be one knows, on an academic level, to place things that babies should not have out of said babies's sight.

As an actual parent, one learns that "what baby can see" is gradually redefined as "what baby can find."

Case in point: Our phone just now rings and while Ellen answers it*, my mission is to turn down the Xuxa DVD currently playing. As I come around the corner, I am confronted with direct evidence that my child's perception is now quite a bit sharper than it once was.

That evidence being her holding my large wine glass, a stemmed bell nearly as big as her head which I had quite conscientiously hidden behind a book and a pillow, in both hands, being carried merrily toward mama with a "so-cute-it-melts-lead" grin on her face. She looked at me once, smacked her now obviously wet lips twice, made a satisfied "ahhhh!!!" sound that would do a gin lush proud, and handed me the now empty glass with a helpful "bwha pah?!?"

Well, let's just hope she sleeps well tonight.

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* I detest phones. Ellen is incapable of letting one ring more than three times. She fairly levitates toward them whenever they make noise. The division of labor when the phone rings became obvious quite early in our marriage.