One of the things Ellen and I like to do in public places is people watch. We pick out particularly remarkable folks and then speculate on what outrageous thing might be going on with them. It's sort of like the Weekly World News in motion. Examples:

"Whoa... ok... are they friends, or are they friends?"
"Oh. My. God. That woman has no ass whatsoever."
"Rrrrg. Ya know, there are certain people in this world who just should not wear spandex, mmkay?"
Me: "Heh. Let's play 'how much did she pay for those boobs'" Ellen: "I'll take D-cups for $4500 Alex"

So tonight we were at one of our main Mexican restaurant hangouts, and I immediately notice a couple sitting about four tables across from us. They were both very young and very pretty. I speculated he was 21, tops, a J-Crew guy with Dockers and a blue button-down. Ellen figured she might, might be 20, but looked more like 18, with dark bobbed hair and a white collared blouse.

I figured they were on a first date, because they were so well scrubbed, particularly the guy. Ellen speculated that she was acting too familiar with him for that, but it was pretty recent considering they never bothered to notice the two weirdoes across the way staring at them.

It was only when they got up to leave that we were both proven badly wrong. Being a pig, the first thing I noticed was she was wearing what we both later agreed was a "f*ck me now, please" skirt that just barely, and I mean barely covered her ass if she pulled it down really firmly. Ellen spotted the flowers she picked up, and I noticed the DELTA AIRLINES ticket sticking out of her purse.

We both then immediately changed the assessment: On-line sweethearts who had just met, or a long-distance relationship that just got reunited, fresh off the plane because that restaurant was just one metro stop down from the airport.

Either way, considering the flowers he gave her and the skirt she gave him, we both agreed as they left we were looking at two people determined to boink each other stupid tonight. Good for them!